This happens when you move.
I wish that when I lose things there would always be a logical solution, but there really isn't. I am looking at life and the things I have lost, or rather misplaced this past year and seeing a pattern here. Mostly the pattern of a very cluttered headspace
Right before Olivia's wedding last August we shopped a little for her upcoming working girl wardrobe,and she bought some career clothes. She left them with me, because she wouldn't be needing them anytime soon. Big mistake. They are gone and have never been found. I can see the bag on the floor in her room, in and remember thinking don't forget to bring those with her other stuff when you go visit. When we unpacked the big load we brought her when they were moving in, the clothes had vanished. To this day, they have never been recovered. I have this little dream of finding them in the unpacking process but that hasn’t happened yet.
I purchased a book the other day at Barnes and Noble on the day it was released, and came home to find my pre-ordered Amazon copy on my doorstep.
Craig and I have the same argument often about where I might have put something, you know, for safekeeping. Usually it is something of his or a needed item in the moment. Like a key or a checkbook. Something I had found "just the place for ” and it has joined everything else missing in the “land of lost and important things.” I hope to find that land mass someday In the unpacking process. Along with the bag of Olivias clothes.
This post is not to point out the disorder of my brain lately, it's to share something else with you. Even more important than the missing stuff I cannot find, there is something else bothering me. It reminds me of another time in life where there were a lot of missing things and extra chaos. Around here we call those "the drinking years" I don't like to be reminded about the years I lacked clarity, memory and common sense in a lot of situations.
Of course, we don't like to be reminded of the past when it was hurtful but I have come to realize these past few months that sometimes it can be helpful instead of hurtful.
It has been brought to my attention (by me) that I blamed every mistake & mishap in the past on my drinking. In doing this I had set up recovery life to be perfect and absent of any of these illogical moments I have recently noticed. That is simply not possible, because you know, life. I used to use alcohol to cope with stress, not a good idea. Then I quit drinking and I had to learn how not to drink through the hard stuff. Then I added a few more coping skills to deal with stress like biking, and meditation but now I can see I need to add a few more when life amps up like it has of late or at least make sure I am keeping up on self-care.
I am four days behind on my advent reading. I haven't worked out in about two months. That is changing. Today. Those are two things that work well for me when they are prioritized. Quiet time and a workout to start my day sets me up for a good day Of being my best self. I WANT to be my best self, even in the midst of moving and holiday chaos, and that my friend is up to me. Is there something you need to do (or not do) to start your week off right?
I wanted to share one of my favorite sayings with you. Maybe write this down and use it as your guide today. You might be surprised at the way your day unfolds.
Philippians 4:8-9. Finally, brothers and sisters, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about such things. Whatever you have learned or received or heard from me, or seen in me—put it into practice. And the God of peace will be with you.