There are things in life that are non-negotiable to me:
Family. Health. Faith. Integrity.
It is hard for me to think about how every time I drank, I negotiated them in some way shape or form.
All of those things are precious and good, but the devil loves to go after what is good and twist and turn these things until they are ugly beyond recognition.
What we intend for good the devil goes after and makes it bad. His biggest tool? His favorite?
It robs us of the moments of life that should be stunningly beautiful.
I am asking you today, “Why? Why are all these things still negotiable in your life?" You may say, “But they're not.”
If alcohol (or name your poison) has ever once disrupted any of the above, I am here to tell you they are still being negotiated.
There is a constant conundrum in your mind, constantly hijacking your thoughts about giving in to the lie we tell ourselves, it’s time to be done with this.
That phrase got me through the hardest time in my life. When I quit, I quit. Saying to myself often, “It is not an option today or any day. Game over.”
I approached quitting with a fierceness of saving my life. Not just my own, but those I love.
Their lives were non negotiable, but every time I drank I played Russian roulette with a loaded gun, not knowing who was going to get hit with the stray bullets of my actions and words. When I started firing that gun, people I love always got hurt. But yet I reloaded.
I thank God every day no one died. Am I being dramatic? Not at all.
I did some reckless things in my darkest days and often woke up in disbelief that I was alive and hadn’t hurt anyone else. I had though, if not physically, always emotionally.
This is so painful to write, I actually had to shut my laptop and walk away for a bit. There are so many memories I don’t want to relive. But I am for you. To make my point. So many people I love are drowning their lives in alcohol.
Just freaking do it. Quit screwing around with your life and theirs. You were made for more and you know it. Quit “cutting back.” Stop telling yourself you can have it both ways with a little here and there or for special occasions. It’s not working, it will never work and you need to accept that.
Satan is telling you a lie. That life will never be fun again. That you won’t be able to relax, relieve stress. Perfect, you are now relying on a drug to get through life. Is that what you want? I doubt it.
Get rid of the monkey of addiction on your back. You will stay stuck until you do. I promise you that. Stuck in a life of your mind being ruled by decisions to drink or not to drink, where to buy it, how to hide it, how to deny it and how to lie about it. And then it’s gone, and that is how you lived.
And that is the legacy you leave behind for the people who loved you.
There’s a lot going on in my personal life lately. The beginning of this week was hard, really hard. More about that in another post. I want to share this part with you though: I did it sober and I trusted God to get me through. Every hurtful, anxiety filled, tearful moment. I felt it all. It was hard but you know what?
I’m ok. You will be too.
There is so many resources available for you to start the recovery process. Email me and I will be happy to point you in the right direction. Remember it’s just an email, no big deal. But it might save your life.